


burn bright for me tonight

by phloridas



Category: Phandom/The Fantastic Foursome (YouTube RPF)
Genre: Christmas, Fluff, Gift Exchange, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-23
Updated: 2018-12-23
Packaged: 2019-09-25 15:24:44
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,849
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17123894
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/phloridas/pseuds/phloridas
Summary: For a long time, there was nothing Dan loved more than Christmas itself, until his and Phil's personal Christmas celebrations came around. Held the day before they fly up north, it's an entire day just for them with little to no distractions--which is exactly what Dan needs after such an intense year.Nothing could possibly top it.Well. Maybe notexactlynothing....





	burn bright for me tonight

**Author's Note:**

  * For [animad](https://archiveofourown.org/users/animad/gifts).



> Huge thanks to Alexis for her awesome support and for cleaning this up for me! And thank you animad for providing such a lovely prompt! Happy holidays!

If there’s something Dan loves more than anything, it’s traditions. Especially the ones he and Phil have built together.

Somewhere along the line, amidst the hecticness that is their lives and the holiday season, they always find time for each other. And when everything is...as _much_ as it is in December, those little pockets of togetherness make all the difference.

Celebrating never has come easy to Dan. After all, when life is constantly zooming past you with no way of stopping and you’re always tangled up in the _whys_ of everything, it doesn’t feel like there’s much cause for celebration--even when the world is putting on its biggest thousand-watt smile and everyone seems to be joining in. But with a little help, these days he’s finally beginning to understand that even the smallest things are worth celebrating.

Of course, it helps that Phil’s always had enough festive spirit for ten people.

After nine years, Dan’s just come to expect that whenever Mariah Carey comes on, Phil’s gonna be pulling him up to dance with the goofiest smile and more recently, a pair of matching Auntie Roz hats. It’s impossible for Dan not to grin at that, corny as it may be.

It’s impossible for him not to feel a tiny stab of pride whenever he glances over at their tree, too.

Sure, maybe it’s not the one that’s followed them through two massive cities and varying states of happiness, but that’s not what’s important. It’s every little bauble hanging off the branches, the ones they so carefully arrange every year (some of which still make Dan tear up even now) that matter the most.

It’s the decorating process, long though it may be, that’s burrowed its way into Dan’s heart and made it that much harder to allow a camera into the equation. It’s the familiarity of Phil’s favourite Christmas playlist and the sharp scent of Starbucks that’s accompanied the process these last few years.

It’s knowing that he always has someone to share all this with, regardless of where their lives have led them that year.

What can Dan say? He’s a sucker for the familiar and the comforting, he supposes.

Or maybe he’s just a sucker for Phil. It’s hard to tell.

Truthfully, though, his favorite tradition isn’t any of that. As much as he loves the tree decorating, their mince pie and festive drink codexes, even Christmas shopping and their dinners with Martyn and Cornelia and Bryony and their management team, none of them hold a candle to his and Phil’s private Christmas celebration.

Dan will swear he’s _not_ materialistic--well, he appreciates nice things but doesn’t everyone?--and that it’s not about the presents. And truthfully, it isn’t.

Well, not entirely, anyway.

It’s more about the thought that goes into those gifts and the little sparks of joy he gets from picking out Phil’s presents. Giving themselves an entire day just for them before jetting (or chugging) off to their separate families sure doesn’t hurt either.

Even if it does make those days apart that much harder.

But it’ll be different next year.

Just the thrill of that promise is enough to settle a bit of the longing that pulls at Dan’s heart whenever he’s forcibly reminded of that sad brown bedroom once again. Things have been getting better every year, though, however slightly--so maybe this year won’t be so bad?

It’s just past 3am when Dan finally slips from beneath the sheets and pads over to his wardrobe, where Phil’s gifts are hidden behind some of Dan’s heaviest jumpers. Like a mouse, he snatches them up, wincing at the slight crinkling of their far too colourful wrapping paper.

Inches away, Phil lets out a tiny exhale.

Dan freezes for a second, his heart banging against his chest until he remembers that it really doesn’t matter. It’s not like he and Phil can keep secrets from each other anyway.

But maybe it’s the magic of the season bubbling up in him anyway. Sappy as it may be, Dan can’t help the extra rush of love that comes with each reminder of his favourite day of the year.

Sneaking down the hallway and into the lounge, a slew of memories play before Dan’s eyes. How many times has he done this very walk to nestle his carefully chosen gifts for this very person beneath their tree? In the little homes that they built together, and one that maybe wasn’t theirs but sure was home to Dan when he needed one?

And--hold on a second. Is that _sugar_ Dan’s smelling? And chocolate?

Screw his annual custom of scouring under the tree to find his own presents. Phil’s set out _cookies_ for them, on a tiny round table that Dan almost tripped over! Just behind them is Dan’s light box, displaying “Merry Christmas Dan <3” in it.

Dan just stands there, clutching his chest for a few moments as he blinks back the tears that have suddenly sprouted.

This is new.

But it’s the best kind of new.

A few minutes later, Dan’s sliding into bed with a chocolate and cinnamon-coated tongue and a lightness in his heart. Phil sighs a little and pulls Dan close, Dan swiping the pillow Phil was previously holding and nestling it behind his head in one smooth motion.

He’s unsure if Phil’s actually awake or not but regardless, he whispers a “Thank you” anyway. Phil’s lips curl up in the softest of smiles and with that, Dan snuggles even closer, closing his eyes as memories of their Christmases together dance in his head.

 

\--

For a little while after he wakes up, Dan completely forgets what day it is. That’s easy to do when last night’s sweetness has completely washed off his tongue.

But a few minutes into his morning Twitter scroll, Phil grabs his arm with wide eyes and the absolute cutest grin and just like that, a bit of the magic flows back into Dan.

“Dan!” Phil says, his voice just above a whisper. “Dandandan, don’t tell me you forgot what today is!”

Dan just answers with a kiss to Phil’s cheek and an extra soft squeeze. “‘Course not. Merry almost Christmas, Phil.”

“Merry Christmas, Dan.”

They stay there for a few moments, wrapped in each other’s arms, drinking in the brilliant white sky streaming through the crack in the shades. Dan allows his lips to trace over some of his favourite parts of Phil, soft and lingering, until Phil starts squirming just a bit.

“You ready for present time, babe?” Dan giggles.

“Mmmmm, I was _born_ ready,” Phil counters. “Just wait till you see what I got you. You’re gonna die, sir Daniel.”

“Oh, that’s a threat now, is it?” Dan says, running his eyes all over Phil, a smirk dancing at the edges of his lips. “Well. We’ll see about that, won’t we?”

And he slinks out of the room, heading down to the kitchen--but not before giving Phil’s ass a deft pinch, of course.

It is their Christmas, after all.

Their coffee routine becomes a languid affair that morning. Despite this, there’s still an inexplicable unease fluttering in the dark recesses of Dan’s mind.

So he takes some slightly deeper breaths, forces himself to focus on things he can see and hear, like the soft hum of the microwave as it heats up the water for Phil’s instant coffee and the way the sun makes little diamonds on the shelves when Dan opens the cupboards.

Then there’s a pair of arms wrapping around his bare chest and hair tickling at his neck and _ohhhh_ is that nice.

Dan instantly melts into the touch. He twists around slowly, his face a giant question mark. But Phil just smiles and presses a kiss beneath Dan’s ear before detaching and settling himself at the table.

“You know what?” Phil says, once they’re both seated with steaming festive mugs and identical bowls of cereal. “I’m quite glad we’re doing this today, instead of at my mum and dad’s like last year. I kinda missed having our own gift exchange.”

Dan takes his time chewing his next spoonful, really allowing the Crunchy Nut and almond milk to wash over his tongue before finally swallowing. “Yeah. I mean, as amazing as that was, I’m still not used to people giving a fuss over what we got each other. Well, besides…. you know. But I really like it being our thing.”

“Me too,” Phil mumbles around his next mouthful.

Dan just smiles down into his bowl.

It really is nice having some things just for them.

A few minutes of companionable silence pass, then Phil’s cold toes are suddenly tapping against Dan’s leg. “Hey. Hey. Hey. You saw the tree last night, right? Or, well, you saw what was by it anyway?”

“Oh my _god_ Phil, put some slippers on or something. Your toes are like giant ice cubes!” Dan protests.

Phil just makes a face. Of course it’s nothing but soft. “Fiiiiiine. But did you see it?”

“Yes, of course I saw it, you spoon,” Dan says. “You didn’t hear me say thank you last night?”

“Oh!” Phil shakes his head a little. “I may remember something about that. Hard to say, though.”

Dan has half a mind to lean over and kiss the gleeful smirk off Phil’s lips. He very nearly leans in too, but chooses to grab his mug and roll his eyes instead. “Well, in any case. Thank you again. It really was a lovely 3am surprise.”

“You know what, I’m not even gonna bother commenting on that bedtime. Merry Christmas,” Phil giggles.

“Thanks,” Dan says, suddenly noticing the now-empty bowls and mugs before them. “Oh hey,” he adds. “I believe I was promised death by presents today?”

“Well. Don’t sound so excited there, mate.” But Phil’s smiling as he pushes himself out of his seat anyway.

Five minutes later, they’re both wearing their comfiest pajamas and sitting on the hardwood floor in front of the tree. Up in the lounge, it may not appear quite as magical as it did last night, but Dan doesn’t mind. It’s not like it’s any less special, not with Phil here.

“You left some of the cookies? Awww, Dan. Thank you!”

Of course the minute Dan turns to face him, Phil’s already stuffing a chocolate chip cookie in his mouth with a massive grin, a deformed gingerbread man dangling from his fingers.

“I figured they were for today anyway,” Dan says. “But can I _pleaseeee_ give you your gifts first? I got some really good ones this year. Please, Phil?” He pulls out his best doe eyes, doing everything in his power to fight the smile that’s just dying to take over his face.

“Oh, _fine._ But you better not be sneking me. I know your sneking face.”

“No sneks here, I promise.” Dan bats his eyes while pulling his smallest box from under the tree. “This one first!”

Phil just shoots him the fondest of side eyes while Dan folds his hands in his lap to hopefully keep his fingers from tapping excessively.

Within seconds, Phil’s already ripped into the parcel to find….

“Dan!!! You said you weren’t gonna snek me!!”

He leans over to smack Dan in the arm with the small white box of hair regrowth treatment, his teasing smirk only growing bigger as they both dissolve in laughter loud enough to fill the entire building. (Alright, maybe that’s just Dan. But judging by the deep crinkles near Phil’s eyes, he loves it anyway.)

“It’s not a snek! It’s an _investment_ ,” Dan protests, snatching the wrapping paper off the ground in a futile attempt to defend himself.

Phil just stares at it in amusement for a few seconds before shaking his head and dropping the box to the side.

“You’re such a dork,” Phil sighs. “I can’t believe this is our tenth Christmas together.”

And just like that, those words are enough to melt some of Dan’s playfulness into pure fondness. “God. It is, isn’t it?”

There’s a few seconds of comfortable silence as they each gaze down at the floor, then back at each other with softened eyes and deep smiles. Something sharp tugs at Dan’s heart but he lets it be.

They’ve both come a long way from their terrified 18 and 22 year old selves. Yet Dan wouldn’t trade that first Christmas together for the world.

He can’t let himself get too soft, though, so he pulls a long rectangular parcel from the stash. “Okay, I _promise_ this one isn’t a snek. It actually may be my favourite of the three.”

It really is. This is the one he spent the most time on, the one he spent so many hours tweaking until it perfectly captured their last year together. It has the most _Dan_ in it than either of the others.

Phil just side eyes him again, then snatches up the gift and rips it open anyway.

“ _Dan._ Oh my god, you didn’t!”

Phil’s voice is a near whisper, soft as candlelight and just as sweet. His eyes are positively reverential as he runs a finger over the raised letters on the cover of the photo album.

“Of course I did. You know I can’t allow our tour memories to only live inside our phones. Just, uhhhh….” Dan pauses as Phil slowly opens the front cover, “ignore that smudge right there, I kinda forgot I was cursed for all eternity.”

Of course, Phil’s eyes go straight to the barely legible message but he just giggles sweetly. “I love it anyway. This is getting a special place of honour in the forever home. Thank you.”

Dan beams.

“So,” Phil says after a few moments, “you got any more or can I give you yours now? Pleaaaseeee?”

“Mmmm, not so fast there, Lester,” Dan says, pulling out a tall, brightly wrapped box. “As a matter of fact, there is one more. It’s kinda our new tradition, if you get my drift.”

Instantly, Phil’s face lights up, his smile growing even deeper when he finally rips apart the paper and opens the smooth white box.

Inside is a candle, but it’s not just any candle. Much like the deer Dan got him a couple years ago, this one is green and shaped like a dragon--well, if dragons could sit on their butts like dogs anyway. Phil runs his fingers over and over the scales, his lips slightly parted. The adorableness is enough to make Dan’s heart burst.

“Dan, I…. how do you always find the _coolest_ things? I almost don’t wanna burn this now, it’s too pretty!”

“Isn’t it, though? I thought it would look amazing in the lounge of the new place, maybe even next to the tour album,” Dan says. “But hey, more importantly, are you gonna name it?”

“Hmmmmm, I think I’ll wait for a name to come to me,” Phil says. “I’m way way way too excited to see you open yours. You’re gonna love it, I know it!!” And he shoves a messily wrapped square box into Dan’s hands.

“You’re never gonna learn to wrap, are you?” Dan teases. Unlike Phil, he takes his time carefully peeling at each piece of tape and reveling in Phil’s squirming.

“Hey, I did an amazing job wrapping that! But come _onnnnnn_ , I’m gonna go old and grey just watching you open it!”

“I told you the hair regrowing stuff was a good investment!” Dan laughs. “Now, for your information--” His next words are cut off as he finally pulls the short black box out of the paper and lifts up the top.

“Oh my god, _Phil._ This…. I…. fuck.”

And just like that, time stops as Dan rolls the gorgeous candle between his hands (it’s _heavy_ too, much heavier than it looks) and gazes down at all the little black squares so perfectly placed on the snowy white surface. He tilts it toward the tree, where a burst of colour suddenly dances over the pot. So not only is it the most gorgeous thing he’s ever seen--well, _second_ most gorgeous--but the black specks are _reflective_ too?

It’s too much. Dan may actually explode.

“Phil, I….” he stutters, voice breaking as he regains the power of speech. “This is the most beautiful thing anyone has ever given me. Thank you. I love it so so so much. I love _you_ so damn much.”

“Merry Christmas, Dan,” Phil answers simply.

“Merry Christmas,” Dan whispers back before leaning in to press the softest of kisses to Phil’s lips. He’s shocked to find his eyes are wet when he pulls away.

It hits him all at once. In that moment, _finally_ , Dan has all he’ll ever need.

It’s a beautiful feeling. Intoxicating, even. Maybe not as beautiful as the candle (which smells incredible too of course-- _how_ Phil found something this perfect is a mystery to Dan yet maybe that’s just part of the magic), but it’s so much more than Dan could ever ask for.

And isn’t that what Christmas is all about?

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you so much for reading! <3 
> 
> Tumblr link


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